At my Booking in appointment a couple of weeks ago the first thing the midwife said to me was “I’ll be disappointed if you don’t want to try for a vbac”. (A vbac is a vaginal birth after caesarean)
Now the one things that has been worrying me ever since I found out I was pregnant was giving birth. My last pregnancy ended with an elective caesarean. I was scared when I found out I would be having one but I had a few days to prepare myself and my recovery was pretty swift with no complications.
For some reason I assumed I would be offered another csection but I now know this might not be the case. My midwife sounded like she was reading from a script when she spoke to me. She never wavered her gaze from filling in my maternity notes nor spoke to me like an individual.
I really want a caesarean. Since my first (a mere 15 months ago) I’ve lost any confidence I had in my ability to give birth naturally. I can’t believe last time I was going to antenatal swimming classes and exercising my pelvic floor and planning my water birth. This time round I’m in serious denial that I’m pregnant, let alone going to have to give birth.
Tomorrow I have an appointment with a consultant to discuss my options. I have no idea what the outcome will be. There’s no medical reason why I should have a caesarean and I know there are risks involved. 24 hours until I find out if I get the caesarean I really want.
4 Comments
Not Yet a Yummy Mummy
June 29, 2011 at 3:50 pmI’m so with you! I didn’t have a c-section but wished I had. Instead I had an assisted delivery in theatre with venteus. Honestly the most horrific and barbaric experience of my life. I appreciate the risks of surgery but genuinely don’t think it can be any worse than last time. Fingers crossed for us both xx
Hayley
June 29, 2011 at 4:48 pmMidwives are a funny thing. I physically cannot give birth naturally and yet every time I visit them they mention VBAC’s, I simply refer them to my consultants notes within my notes and they soon realise their mistake! They are literally auto programmed to encourage VBACs i think and don’t get me wrong I’m not anti VBAC at all, if I could give birth naturally I would but I physically cant and so an elective c-section is the way to go. It is my understanding that they cannot force you to VBAC so just be firm on your feelings about the matter and keep keep pushing, it may take a few appointments and you may have to argue with the midiwives a bit but if its what you want then go for it!
Mama Syder
June 29, 2011 at 9:17 pmLike Hayley, I too can’t physically give birth naturally and all four of my kids were c-sections, however this did not stop the midwives putting me through a trial labour with my 2nd child only to discover that I really can not give birth naturally.
Dont let the midwife make you feel crap about your decision on how you wish to give birth and certainly do not worry about ‘disapointing’ her. Fingers crossed you get what you want x
Kat
June 29, 2011 at 11:05 pmI’m guessing I probably can give birth but for one reason and another I have had 3 c-sections. Personally I would say if there is no medical reason to have one then don’t. If your consultant wants you to go for a VBAC then maybe you might find it helpful to talk through you previous experience and fears so that you can move towards a confident birth however it happens.